A long time ago some smart-ass started telling what came to be known as Pat and Mike jokes, slurs meant to mock the Irish.

Irish Americans eventually laughed loudest. Countless descendants of the old sod even embraced the monkey-faced Notre Dame leprechaun as one of us, a mean-spirited caricature that proves a sad irony at the core of these stereotypic jokes. Laughing at ourselves is one thing. Helping our enemies laugh at us is an entirely different pot of Irish stew. Joining racists in mocking who we are goes beyond the emerald pale.

Yet some truth exists in stereotypes.

Some unexpected brilliance does, too.

That’s why I’m writing two-page Pat and Mike stories, two-man dialogues I’m packing into a collection called Pat and Mike Rule the World. I’ll post each new story on my website at https://theoutlawcorbett.com/ and on my Facebook page. Maybe in a year or so we’ll load the words into a book. Or maybe not. Like always, I’ll figure it out.

Our ethnic neighborhoods are nowadays changing and not necessarily for the better. Pat and Mike? They’re trying. For better or worse, their personal conversations could take place in Boston, Wilkes-Barre, Philadelphia, New York, Chicago or any other once vibrant Irish American sanctuary. But make no mistake about locale. Pat and Mike live in Scranton, Pennsylvania, birthplace of former president Joe Biden. Not surprisingly, Pat and Mike are ashamed to admit Biden is as homegrown as they are.

Writing Pat and Mike stories inspires edgy fun. Like peppering a jab into a heavyweight boxing opponent’s puss, punchy dialogue provokes backlash and emotion. Sacrilegious and incendiary, Pat and Mike exist as purebred star-spangled white men. Their stories tell truths not often publicly shared. No problem is too big to solve or too intellectual for the lads to address. Pat and Mike think and talk like bigots although they say they don’t do it on purpose. They’re just trying to understand a changing world. Fairness isn’t always as easy as you think. Taking sides is easier. Pat and Mike take sides, sometimes turning up on both sides at the same time.

So after you read each Pat and Mike story make sure to look in the mirror. Do you agree with Pat or Mike or both? Do you know somebody like them?  Are you like them? Do you want to be even more like them?

If you don’t know, ask me.

I’ll ask Pat and Mike.

They’ll tell us even if we really don’t want to know.